These days I've been thinking everyone would die someday, which is the definite end for every creature in the earth. Our being will all become blank once we die.
My life is already full of sadness and pessimistic thoughts. It seems that I've never been truly happy. Happiness is only like a whim that visited me temporarily and sporadically. I've been planning in my head how I can end my life. Dreaming about traveling to Japan and dead in the sea, I disappeared like a bubble, as if I'd never existed. I didn't want to commit suicide due to fear of pain, but thinking about it made me feel better, or the tangle of emotions would suffocate me completely.
Recently I've figured out that there is no need to kill myself. I've already accepted the truth of human life and society, which is awash with darkness including sorrow, pain, contempt, cruelty and so on. I just have to follow the natural path of my life and walk towards death with tranquillity, embracing whatever happens in the future.
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